Why Me?

WHY ME ??

Depression, Anger, Anxiety , Suicidal Thoughts,

~The inability to do simple tasks, poor memory

~Insomnia or Nightmares

These problems often come from a

trauma we have experienced.

If the trauma happened in childhood,it has a deeper more long lasting impact. Adults experience physical, emotional

and cognitive problems, Because the painful emotions were

never faced or verbally spoken.

As a child those feelings were buried to help you survive ~ but they will not stay silent.

Facing the emotional pain of the trauma, letting out those buried feelings, is an important part of therapy.

~ I do not ask clients to share the details of what happened to them, or to to relive the horror,

unless they want to.

~I walk with you through discovering the feelings that are trapped inside, causing you to feel depressed, worthless, unable to think or function, anxious, suicidal, and much more.

A Narcissistic Parent

A Narcissistic Parent--

~The Child Is Not Permitted To Develop His or Her Own Identity-they are molded to be like parent & to satisfy the parent's high need for attention.

~Their personal needs are so overwhelming and dominant, there is little space for the needs of others.

--They have tremendous difficulty tuning into their children's thoughts and feelings. Their own feelings and unmet needs simply overshadow everything.

~Their showing love is conditioned on how good the children makes the parents feel, and this inconsistency or unpredictability tends to create emotional insecurity and co-dependence.

~The parent exercises controlling behavior by telling their children how they should feel, how they should behave, and what decisions they should make. They are not permitted have or voice their own feelings.

~The Parent Always Puts Their Own Needs Before the Basic Needs of His or Her Child For Security, Safety, Love, Comfort, and Nurturing.

h ttp://www.positive-parenting-ally.com/narcissistic-parents.html

Abusive Childhood

CHILD ABUSE HAS LONG LASTING EMOTIONAL EFFECTS~

Abuse comes in many forms: Physical, Emotional, Sexual, Verbal, or Neglect where child doesn't have food, care, or security.

~ ~ Children who undergo proper therapy and treatment for child abuse are able to work through many of their lasting emotional problems.

Effects of childhood abuse may include:

~ Depression ~ Anger ~Anxiety

~Feelings of worthlessness

~ Lack of trust ~Impaired brain development

~Poor physical Health ~ Cognitive difficulties

~ Inability to engage in fulfilling relationships

~Low self-worth ~Feeling “too damaged to love”

~ Alcoholism ~Abusive behaviors ~Drug addiction

~Difficulties with emotional regulation

~Suicidal thoughts and behaviors

~Poor emotional and mental health

http://www.ascentchs.com/mental-health/child-abuse/symptoms-signs-effects/

Narcissistic Spouse or Partner

Certain characteristics appear with stunning regularity among narcissists.

Since narcissism is on a continuum, some will have more than others.

These characteristics apply to males & females

~Self-centered. Their needs are always most important.

~No remorse for mistakes or misdeeds.

~Unreliable, not dependable.

~Does not care about the consequences of their actions.

~Projects faults on to others- never their fault.

~ Insensitive to needs and feelings of others.

~ Easy to anger & rage ~Little if any conscience.

~ Has a good front to impress people and exploit them.

~ Strives to appear caring & understanding - only to be manipulative

~ Twists conversation to their gain at the expense of others

~ Pathological Liar ~ No real values ~Angry Mercurial Moods

~ Intense need to control situations, conversations & others.

~ Uses sex to control ~ Does not share ideas, feelings, emotions.

~Very slow to forgive ~ Hangs onto resentment-

~ Secret life ~ Hides Money, Friends and activities.

~ Likes to annoy others - to create chaos and disrupt for no reason.

~Moody- switches from nice to rage without much provocation

http://www.narcissisticabuse.com/characteristics-of-the-narcissist/

Complex PTSD

What types of trauma are associated

with Complex PTSD?

During long-term traumas, the victim is generally held in a state of captivity- physically or emotionally,

according to Dr. J. Herman.

In these situations the victim is under the control of the perpetrator and unable to get away from the danger.

Examples of such traumatic situations include:

Long-term domestic violence Long-term child physical abuse

Long-term child sexual abuse Organized child exploitation rings

https://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/PTSD-overview/complex-ptsd.asp

What symptoms are seen in Complex PTSD?

An individual who experienced a prolonged period

(months to years) of chronic victimization and total control by another may also experience the following difficulties:

Emotional Regulation. Persistent sadness, suicidal thoughts, explosive anger, or inhibited anger.

Consciousness. Includes forgetting traumatic events, reliving traumatic events, or having episodes in which one feels detached from one's mental processes or body (dissociation).

Self-Perception. May include helplessness, shame, guilt, stigma, and a sense of being completely different from other human beings.

Distorted Perceptions of the Perpetrator. Examples include attributing total power to the perpetrator, becoming preoccupied with the relationship to the perpetrator, or preoccupied with revenge.

Relations with Others. Examples include isolation, distrust, or a repeated search for a rescuer. May include a loss of sustaining faith or a sense of hopelessness and despair.